Thursday, August 13, 2020

Six-Pack Smart Books About the Science and Sociology of Sex

Six-Pack Smart Books About the Science and Sociology of Sex Birds do it, bees do it, and basically all of us do it too, even if were supposed to pretend like we dont and not talk about it in polite company or, you know, ever. Sex is an important part of our lives, and whats a person who makes sense of life by  reading to do but find  books about it? Ive been reading  about sex ever since I looked up climax in my parents Merriam-Webster Dictionary back in Ye Olde Days Before Google (the answer wasnt really helpful, in case youre wondering), and Im of the opinion that time spent with a well-researched book on sexuality is time well spent, especially now that interweb makes bad information so, unfortunately, easy to find. Also?  Books about sex are fun! Lets do this. Mary Roach is the queen of experiential journalism, hilarious footnotes, and fascinating facts that are just as inappropriate for quoting in polite conversation as they are irresistibe. For Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex, she went into the archives of sex research to explore the studies that started it all and into modern sex research labs to find out what scientists are studying and how they get answers to questions like Can a person think herself to orgasm? And because shes the best good sport of all good sports, she even volunteered to participate in one of the studies and had sex with her husband INSIDE AN MRI MACHINE. Its the best thing ever. This is an awesome read, period, but especially for anyone who is skeptical about nonfiction being funny or interesting. Kayt Sukels This Is Your Brain On Sex is another terrific offering in this vein. Sukel takes apart the ever-expanding body of research about the brains role in sex, love, and dating to help readers understand whats actually true versus what Cosmo says is true because it makes a good headline. And she gets in on the action too, volunteering for a study in which she, shall we say, clicks her own mouse. For science! (Why did no one tell me this was a career option?) If youre more interested in the sociology end of things, my very-super-favorite recommendation is Leonore Tiefers now-out-of-print (but used copies are available online) Sex is Not a Natural Act Other Essays. Tiefer provides a fantastic introduction to the concept of sex as a social construct and argues that the sexual desires and behaviors we think of as quote-unquote natural are determined not by nature but by the societies and cultures in which we live. The essays in this book are engaging and thoughtful, and the ideas Tiefer puts forth have formed the foundation of how I approach thinking about sex, evaluating statements and studies about sex, and making (or resisting) judgment about other peoples and cultures sexual mores and practices. Perv: The Sexual Deviant in All of Us by Jesse Bering is another excellent read on this topic. Bering presents the long, occasionally hilarious, and often troubling history of how American culture has defined sexual deviance and dysfunction (spoiler alert: it has a lot to do with exercising social control and legislating values). And he makes a compelling case for reframing deviance, particularly where the law is concerned, around the issue of harmthat is, you can think a sexual behavior is weird or believe it is immoral, but you should not attempt to make that behavior illegal unless it poses the risk of causing actual harm to the beings involved (and not imagined harm to non-beings, like the institution of marriage, for example). No matter who you are or how liberal and accepting your attitudes about sex, youre going to encounter something in this book that challenges you to stretch a bit further or reconsider or just resisting saying, Yuck, and that makes it totally worth the pric e of admission. If youre of a relatively liberal persuasion (or youre open to hearing from that side of the fence) and in the mood to think about all kinds of sex-related stuff, you wont do better than Dan Savages latest book American Savage. Building on twenty years of experience as a sex columnist and equal rights activist (he is the creator of the It Gets Better movement), Savage takes on compulsory monogamy (to state that sometimes cheating is the *right* thing to do to save a  relationship), sex education, issues of religion and sexuality, and politics galore. Savages no-bullshit approach and his confident delivery make this a compelling and interesting read evenor especially?when you dont agree with him. For more on the question of monogamywhether its necessary for a stable society, how generally terrible humans are at it, etc.see Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha. And if science and sociology arent enough to satisfy you, theres always philosophy! Alain de Bottons How to Think More About Sex is pretty accessible as philosophy  books go, and it contains a bunch of excellent ideas for changing not the actual amount of time we spend thinking about sex but HOW we think about sex. Its a little brain-bending at points (I think thats what philosophy is supposed to do?) but ultimately a valuable read. Were good at devoting brain-space to sex and not so good at making that sex-focused brain-space constructive and meaningful, and this read is a step toward changing that for yourself. And now, because all good  relationships are built on reciprocity and good listening skills, I ask: what are your  favorite  books on the science and sociology of sex? _________________________ Sign up for our newsletter to have the best of Book Riot delivered straight to your inbox every week. No spam. We promise. To keep up with Book Riot on a daily basis, follow us on Twitter, like us on Facebook, , and subscribe to the Book Riot podcast in iTunes or via RSS. So much bookish goodnessall day, every day. Sign up for True Story to receive nonfiction news, new releases, and must-read forthcoming titles.

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